Life, and other things: Phone dread.

My phone is never out of arms reach, even when I’m in bed it’s under my pillow. 

I actually use it, in the old fashioned way, you know, to make a phone call, every day. But only ever to phone my mum. 

If you’re not my mum, or, in an emergency, one of my actual offspring the chances of me phoning you are slim. And when I say slim I mean non-existent. 

When my iPhone rings I freeze, my heart tries to jump out of my mouth, and I break out in a cold sweat, there are only 3 chances of me answering, if it’s my mum, if it’s someone I gave birth to or if it’s school. And even then, if it IS school I probably won’t answer the first time, because if it’s an emergency they’ll try again. Even if it’s someone I know quite well phoning me I just can’t. I’ll wait a few minutes and then send a text saying something like I’m in meeting, I haven’t got any minutes left, or I’ve been kidnapped by someone who won’t let me take a call but bizarrely WILL allow me to text. I will lie through my teeth rather than having to speak to a friend on the phone. 

I don’t have a landline anymore because although I never answered it, whenever it rang, if I wasn’t in the room I’d shout “Oh that’s probably nothing, leave it” and you could bet your bottom dollar that one of the kids would answer it. Not only would they answer it but they would hand it over to me without having asked WHO was calling. If you know phone anxiety you’ll understand that paralysing feeling of dread that washes over you when you’re handed the phone and have NO idea who’s on the other end.. Fuck that! The house phone mysteriously broke a long time ago, and I’ve been far too busy to replace it. I have no idea WHY I do this, very few people actually have my phone number, and I’ve never had a particularly traumatic phone call, but here is a list of things that scare me more than phone calls.





Do you panic every time your phone rings or do you just casually answer it like a regular person?


One thought on “Life, and other things: Phone dread.

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  1. I totally understand where you’re coming from with this. I avoid answering the phone at all costs and regularly let it go to voicemail. I’ll always either text or email someone before picking up the phone to ring them. The phone fills me with complete dread everytime.
    I know that it started in 2002 when working for a overly demanding boss who would ring me day in day out to find where I was, what I was doing and usually tell me I should be doing something else. If I was to hear the Nokia ring tone I had back then now I know that it would induce a full on panic attack. (He was also one of the leading causes of my anxiety and depression)
    While it’s always good to know that we’re not alone, I hate to think that anyone else would be suffering the same feelings of dread caused by something most people find so non threatening.
    You have my total sympathy!

    Liked by 1 person

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